Dear Hannah
Yes, I know its rare to get a postcard from a sick-bed, but hey – I’m bored out of my mind, and I thought I could pass the time by writing you a good old fashioned letter!
I hope you’ve been doing well with your new gig, digging up Viking-remains in England (it must be cold and muddy right now, though).
Myself, I’m really happy about the patch I received in the mail from our doctor’s office a couple of days ago, after I phoned in with my fever and running nose. This almost translucent little bit of plastic now monitors my health by measuring infection levels, heart rate, oxygen levels, etc. and it communicates with the doctors’ AI. Her AI then sends me nice little messages like; “you should stay at home now,” “drink more water,” “take a nap” and “watch re-runs of classic WestWorld on Netflix”! (Ok, maybe not that last one).
The system monitors and nudges me throughout the day, and it has been making these past few days of influenza bearable. Also, it reports data into the national flu-database for analysis and more training material for health AI’s.
So, I’m now in an age-group, where the doctor suggests that I wear a similar, but even more advanced “health-badge” at all times. This patch will take care of general monitoring of vital-signs and communicate with the health-cloud. While, of course, it sounds nice to have a “backup mother” in your sixties, I’m ALSO thinking it would be terrible to have a “backup mother” in my sixties, meddling with how, when and what I eat and how much I don’t work out. “Big Mother Is Watching You” can be a scary thing, and I’m not quite ready for it. Also, I wouldn’t wanna be “doxed” and shamed at work or, even worse, by your mother. So I’ll wait a few years, I think.
I’d love to get access to the data from your mother’s intelligent lactaid-depository implant, though. It reports how many units are deposited and thereby how much she’s actually ignoring her supposedly lactose-free diet – and these figures would provide valuable leverage in our discussions of how much I’m not working out at the moment…
Hopefully, you’re keeping tabs on your immune-system and inflammation levels up there in the mud – otherwise, I know where you can get a health-badge 🙂
Cheers,
Morten
